ooh these thoughts. go away.
well, lets see what i did todae. helped mom cook lontong. i cut cut, stir stir, fry fry, eat eat, now im full. hehe.
oh. im sure this is personal but i need to just say it out. as perfect as i want my parents to be, they're not lah. over dinner, they just had a disagreement. im glad that my dad could still laugh uh. coz if he didn't it could get worse. hey. this is the first time they 'bicker' infront of me. and it scares me. i think im going to sleep early.
this was what happened.*mom took leave to sew kuzzin's wedding curtain*
(izlyn already left the table)
mom: okay. im tired now so later, you help izlyn bathe, and get ready for sleep.
dad: *laughs* you talk as if i din go to work liddat. im tired too.
me: *laugh along*. haha, but mom more tired leeehh at home. she oso work what.
dad: i mean if u say u're tired, and from work, i understand lah. but now u took leave. so, *haha*, ya.
okay. i thought i could type it but i cant. so thats all you gonna get. after that, i was waiting to clear the dishes, dad would usually rub it in that i had to wash the dishes, but after mom left the table, dad just sat there, doing nothing, staring into empty space and the food.
usually when i tap his shoulder with my wet hands, he would fight back, but when i tapped, he just carried his plate to the basin.
okay okay. getting emotional now. fuck. *control control*
okay. i've been thinking today. out-of-the-box kinda thinking.
what good is it holding back someone who loves you, when there's another person who loves him much more than you do. and when the other girl can give him full satisfaction; you cant. so whats the use of holding it back? no matter how much he says its his decision to stay or wait. but he just needs a lil push to see that the other girl loves him more than i do, and can make him more happier. yupp yupp.
they were happy once. cant deny that. me, usual heartbreaker, had to step in coz i was jealous. shit.
i've been a bitch. to all, im sorry in every single way.
Eyzee`Anne`Isabellei know you still love him.
Eyzee`Anne`Isabelle