Take me as I Am

Sunday, August 13, 2006

for i cannot pretend i'm not affected.

for me to be completely okay. you need to shut up. you need to be gone. you need to be dead in my life.

what more do i want from you? nothing more. but explain this reaction of mine. stupid.

okay, lets not be affected and lets continue with blogging.

today was just another one of those days in the past. where im bored shitless and emotions play in my head n heart like crazy. but its okay, these can be pushed away first. =)

lil sis woke me up by playing her keyboards early in the morning at 12. haissh. but nevermind. i still love her. did the daily stuff, went out to buy clothes. i want shoe and bag too, but i thought that wud be too much to ask for. =)

went to eat. i didnt like my lunch, but just be thankful lah.

went home, crapped, and here i am blogging away and thinking about someone that i shudnt be thinking of.

seriously how come things are this way. and how come im not even sure about how i feel? its just stupid to me. its all a huge blur and everything was fast and i'm still completely blur right now. that explains the calm Izyan i guess.

i realised i havent been talking about this matter much. i've only been confessing bit by bit. i need to talk about this until i feel damn relieved, but its going to take the whole night. only SmarterChild is able to tolerate my yakking away.

why cant i just express FULLY how i TRULY feel. there's just so much inside me that i need to express. but i just cant find the perfect time to do it.

its okay laaa. things will get back to normal soon.
i mean its already normal lah. but not perfectly normal yet.

anyways, cant wait for everything to happen.
what?
i dont know. but i feel so excited now.

i think its the time of the month. that explains the mood swings. sheesh. hehees. and im craving for marshmellows. I NEED THEM BADLY EACH NIGHT.

extracted from A Lonely September by Plain White
T's
I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
extracted from Sad Story by Plain White
T's
Thought I'd be the one you'd adore
I always thought
I would be so much more
Now I'm all alone in this war

This is the end of a really sad story
But don't feel bad for me
I started out alone
And in the end that's where I'll be
Like the star of a really sad story
You don't live happily
I started out alone
And in the end that's where I'll

be

i love this band.

Eyzee`Anne`Isabelle
Meski ku memohon dan meminta hatimu
Jangan pernah tinggalkan dirinya

8:46 PM; be my prince Y